(certified 85% true) Nov 22, 2011

Meye dogee waz waging his tayle wen I kame houghm. Tha kitee kame ova an perrd. I waz guna pught tha trish in tha yell owe baghs to gough too de damp wen ow to know waya kame a louwd noyse wot pught tha skare in mee. It waz lighk de sayound thaght jelo make wen yu skoop it wid a beg espune. A jy ant schlerp lighk wen yu rep out tha hart dering sackrafice.

Meye dogee eyars ponted strate up an he sniffded a roun tilly smyelled a oda wot mayd im skweek. Tha kitee rand an id unda a bayed in tha seekret gayest rum. He dint perrd no moe an I thank myne dogee wonted ta kareep unda wid tha kitee an kloze I's.

I thank maibee oui wuz caut insied may ja whor or moovee poot on bye may ja stew deeo lik kolumbee ah an twintee eth sen churee fucks. Skweez mai nglish.

Mai bee yu ar kiend ov lik shaykin n yore chikin butes lik ah petrifide whimp loozar skairrd shit lis.

Soz yu woont bee skairrd I will chuk on tha noyse n sees wit it iz. I snaked ova ta tha kichin cownta an typ toad ta tha ej bye tha frij. I lukt a rown the ej an saw a m tee bol off jelo on tha rug an a squeeral wuz eeten tha jelo on tha flor. It reelee wuz jelo an nought tha rep owt a hart lyke brootl sackrafice.

Sun a mye beech meye dogee an kitee wa skayerd a va squeeral.